5th of July

01.01

Hello little young ones!

Your Pandora is finally back with my very first legit entry for this year. First, I would like to apologize for disappearing for a couple of months. Life was so tough with me. I really could not mention all the details here but rest assured that I’m totally bouncing back after a great fall and a headshot.

For the first half of this year, I’ve learned a lot. Seriously learned a lot. There were stuff as well that really caught me off guard. Surprises that touched me in such a way that made me weighed things maturely like I’ve never done before. Like ever! There were also major life changing decisions that I took a leap off. I struggled to some, I survived the rest. Life is indeed amazing.

Honestly, I’m still struggling with some issues with my life right now. Career wise, I’m still torn between which country to focus on to, as to when I should really push myself in taking  my IELTS *though I already have a target date for it but I’m still anxious about it*, and bumping into this question over and over again, “Am I really ready to leave my family and my favorite human to work abroad?”. These mind – wrecking life decisions really scare me. I’m scared because of too much pressure from my family and friends who are now currently working abroad. Whenever I think of it, the first thing that really comes to my mind is How.

How will I start?

How will I survived without my family, my puppy, and my support system?

I know that for some of you little young ones, you could answer my questions so easily. But as for me, I’ve never ever thought of leaving my parents. The longest time that I was away with them was for forty days because of my in – house review for the board exam. Surprisingly, my parents are pretty much supportive now with my plans of working abroad unlike before. They are even the one’s pushing me to keep on applying online and taking my chances wherever life takes me. It’s such a shame that I lacked the effort to really pursue their dreams for me for the past six months now.

BUT, like I said, I’m bouncing back. I am now focusing on my goal – road to becoming a registered nurse outside Philippines. Thanks to my dearest friends who already took and passed the exam for sharing their review materials and some words of advice too especially, for a first – timer like me. As of the moment, I’m still searching for a trusted review center where I can crash in and study while juggling on my schedule at work. While doing so, I’m somewhat leading and encouraging myself to focus on my self – review as well and so far, I’m doing quite good with it.

I also want to share with you about my life as an Emergency Nurse for a year and two months now. It’s dreadful. toxic, unhealthy, stressful, tough, and everything mind – blowing and heart – wrenching but above all these negative vibes that I felt – I AM BLESSED. I’m blessed because I am able to witness adrenaline – rush kind of scenarios almost everyday. I’m blessed because I can encounter different people of all walks of life and see eye to eye the true meaning life through them. I’m blessed because I am faced with so many dilemmas that I thought could only happen in movies and dramas and slowly surpassed them without freaking out or chickening away. I’m blessed because no matter how crazy our admins are or how my seniors treat me in such a way that intimidates me to push myself forward – I can still be myself and I can still work under their suspicious, doubtful, and belittling eyes. All I know is, I am who I am and for as long as I am not hurting anyone, life goes on.

You know little young ones, I’m really good at giving good words to uplift someone’s spirit up. I remembered what my favorite mentor told me before he spent his last day as our Supervisor, he said, “I’m like a little sunshine in fleeting colors” and I’m trying to keep it that way. And even if I’m easily affected by so many things around me and gets so emotional sometimes, I’m always giving my best shot to separate work from my personal life. I’m always all in when it comes to my career and how to really improve my skills and become an efficient nurse to my patients. Same goes with how I balanced my time without compromising my health although sometimes it’s quite tricky and challenging. I’m trying to be my own kind of superhero in me, I guess.

Well, this is all for now little young ones and I promise that this won’t be the last. Now that I have retrieved my access to my WordPress again *I got locked out because I forgot my password*, I can now share more things with you. I’ll be back for more of my Weekly Updates and random talks with you soon.

I miss you little young ones and I couldn’t wait to spend quality time with my safe haven which is blogging.

Love,

Your Pandora♥

P.S. Always appreciate the little things.

02.02

 

 

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Random Questions on the 1st of February.

Here we go again.

I know it’s kinda late for me to greet you on the 1st day of February *because obviously it’s already the 3rd of February* and an advance greetings for Valentines Day as well, right? But know that I am still here and always and right now I have another round of random, thought – provoking, mind – blowing and sometimes heart – quenching questions for you and for myself too. Are you ready little young ones? I hope you are.

I got these random questions on Thought Catalog and I am very happy and excited to share these because it somewhat help us assess ourselves a little bit more. Why? It gives us the opportunity to venture how grounded we are in terms of loving ourselves and the kind of importance we are giving our decisions and ideas to the people around us. So here it goes:

  1. Are you doing something you love? YES! Blogging, pigging – out, and spending quality time with the people I love.
  2. Are you comfortable being single? YES! I am happy and comfortable but I have always been open to change that status until someone would help me discover what “love” and “falling in love” to a different degree. Why not, right?
  3. Do you have at least a little money saved? YES! Emergency fund is a must.
  4. Are you taking responsibility for your actions? Almost always. I hate blaming games.
  5. Are you financially supporting yourself? YES! But I am still living with my parents.
  6. Have you stopped settling in relationships? NO! I am rooting to build genuine relationships with different people at different levels and of different pace. Like I said, I am more open to opportunities this time. It’s a small world with so many mysteries after all.
  7. Are you associating with people who make you better? YES! But somewhat both on the positive and negative side. I just need to manage and be critically wise with how I handle them, myself, and my emotions.
  8. Are you involved in a group or organization that gives you purpose? YES!
  9. Do you have a list of goals to strive to works towards every day? YES! I keep track with my goals. I have a list actually.
  10. Are you comfortable with who you are? Sometimes, not. LOL. But I love myself and that’s something that I am very, very, very sure of.
  11. Have you gone on a trip that changed you or are you planning to? YES! And I miss traveling again. Maybe next year, not now. I need to focus on my career first.
  12. Do you have a list of qualities you look for in a potential partner? YES! I mean, I believe we all have, right? What are those? Hmm. I’ll share that to you little young ones once I found him already. For now, the searching and waiting  game is on.
  13. If you met them would you have the courage and confidence to pursue him? Because I am the woman, NO. But if I am really interested and eager to know him, why not. Love is a two way process, it should never be a ‘solo’ flight.
  14. Do you walk away from situations or people that don’t add value to your life? Both a yes and no. I try my best not to react right away because for me emotional response cuts deeper and I really don’t like the feeling of hurting someone or crossing their limits without any basis. I don’t want others to that to me too so why should I do something hurtful to them, right? *Though it’s not always the case for some.*
  15. Have you stopped causing drama in your life and or others? YES!  I just realized that people will always say something towards you after all.
  16. Do you have a good relationship with your parents? Both a yes and a no. My family is not perfect and my relationship with my parents is not that flawless as well but we always make sure that we settle any issues and solve it day after day after day. especially with my Mamadearest.
  17. Have you forgiven yourself for your past? I did. There are still some past issues that needs to be rekindled and reconciled and resolved. I am taking my time to really see the good side of things and I am not rushing myself to jump to any crazy conclusions and solutions without preparing myself.
  18. Have you fallen in love at least once? YES!
  19. Have you stopped making up excuses in your life? Sometimes.
  20. Do you support a political party and understand why? NONE. I am more on the private organizations because I believe they deliver faster and direct aid to those who truly need the assistance the most.
  21. Do you have a career mentor and someone you look up to for guidance? Yes, I have. I could not mention them all but I do have.
  22. Are you spending money responsibly? This time, yes.
  23. Do you read books often that help you to improve yourself? YES!
  24. Are you a little selfish? Somewhat YES,  because giving too much is an abuse to self. I can be selfless, like BIG TIME – I just need to distinguish the right people that I can be selfless with. I learned from my past.
  25. Are you happy? YES and YES!

 

Were you able to answer these questions already little young ones? I hope you do BUT no pressure. The same way that I remind myself always, to be more patient in terms of decision – making because what we do, think, and say now could make or break us. So we have to be very wise and sensitive. We have to set different strategies and back – up plans every single time because Mother Earth is our battlefield but if have a war within ourselves then it’s a bad sign. Do you agree?

Anyhow, enjoy and start your Friday with a smile little young ones. 🙂

Wide awake. 

Okay.

Time check it’s already Sunday at 1:30 AM *the moment I opened my phone* and that means I’ve been wide awake and starving for almost eleven hours. And whose to blame? No one but ME. HAHA! Like again. 

I’m not physically and mentally lively today, I mean yesterday.

I woke up at Saturday noon when I heard the phone rang and realized it was my best friend Joiz who was calling. I quickly prepped myself to meet her since we already planned to avail Chatime’s Chinese New Year Promo. Because we just simply love promos. Then we grabbed some lunch at Dimsum Break with our friend Drew.

This was Drew’s Facebook post with a caption “Third Wheeling 👽” while we were waiting for our food.

After we had our lunch, Joiz went ahead because she has to meet with her cousins. And since I was planning to buy some stuff for Maki and Munchy, I asked Drew to accompany me. In which he did. We also went to H&M to reward myself another set of rings since I lost mine during Christmas break. And then we went home. That’s how I spent my Saturday afternoon.

I arrived home around 4 PM and that’s when I felt sluggish and lazy but I was sure I wasn’t sleepy at all. I just went straight to bed and thought of watching the last episode of the Korean drama, “Legend of the Blue Sea” starring Lee Min Ho and Jeon Ji Hyun. And sadly, after watching the drama I just consumed the entire six hours checking my Instagram and Facebook feeds, replaying those funny scenes of Kim Hee Chul on the show “Knowing Brothers” and other trending news and music videos. Then I got tired so I took a nap but I suddenly woke up around midnight because my tummy was growling so bad and I felt so humid – ish like feeling. I hurriedly took a bath and fed my puppy Maki and then went outside to check if there are still some place to buy some food but there was none. Sad life.

But since I was extremely hungry, I decided to spend just a little from my extra budget and ordered a box of pizza for myself minus the cola *because of course that would keep me from staying awake* which I don’t want to happened because I need to sleep and also cola is not good for my health. So I said yes to water.

I already took a bite because I was super duper hungry. That is Hawaiian Pizza by the way from one of our local pizza stores here in Cebu.

While eating, I was also busy budgeting my finances and writing down some important stuff for my to – do list for the month of February. Yes, you read it right little young ones. I really keep track of my activities every month *though I almost always fail to accomplish some of my list* but I never give up on doing my best, keeping my focus, and working on those things that I would love to achieve. Like I told you at the start of this year, that I  really am determined to achieve my goals no matter what it takes.

It’s just that today was one of those “lazy days” of mine. And since I am perfectly alert this early, I am starting my Sunday right. Right in a way that I will be removing the clutter and unimportant things in my room and just keep those stuff that would truly matter. Same goes with my thoughts. I should be firm with my decision to really resign with my current work despite the result of our interim review. Last Friday night,  I was blinded by the increase of my salary for a bit because of course the higher I get paid, the bigger the chance that I could give more to my parents. Anyhow, my decision is already final. I will still quit. I will just be more patient and be more frugal so that I could spend less and give more even if I will not be in the company anymore.

Anyhow, this is is all for today little young ones. I’ll keep you posted later or tomorrow about me, the world, and the little things in life. Don’t forget to go to Church or attend to your Sunday Service. Stay safe and be happy. ☺